ONE MORE TIME

In today's world, people don't stay in one place for very long.  My sister lived in the Chicago area for 16 years before making the long awaited move to Florida after her youngest son, Danton, graduated from High School last May.  So the right thing to do in this circumstance was to have a second memorial service in Crystal Lake where Danton had spent practically his whole life.  This was where all his lifelong friends lived.  So only a few days after I finally got back to Minnesota, after being gone for over three weeks,  I packed for another trip.  Only for this one, it was a road trip.  I drove my parents to Chicago so they could attend their grandson's memorial service. It was a small church and the pastor guessed there were over 300 people at the service.  The pews held 180 people and they were full, chairs lined the aisles on both sides, the balcony was full, the entry way was filled and a large room off the sanctuary was filled with peple watching the service on the television they'd set up.  The family sat in the front row as the pastor related events of Danton's life.  I don't think there was a dry eye in the whole church.  Even grown men were wiping tears away.  I think the reality of it all hit when I found myself asking the question, "What if it was one of my children?"  It was then the uncontrollable sobbing started and didn't stop. 

VALENTINE'S DAY 2011

Three days later, I arrived in warm and sunny Naples with a suitcase full of winter clothes.  Although I would never complain about needing to shop for a few summer items.  Jet setting around the country from city to city is one thing, but leaving my newborn granddaughter to attend a funeral, at least fifty years premature, is another thing all together. I entered a house overflowing with love, where now family and friends smiled one minute and broke down crying the next.  There were precious moments of laughter when fond memories of Danton were retold while we sat in the hot tub. A hot tub where Danton sat only days ago.  Then there were other moments filled with anger and resentment towards this unfortunate and untimely accident that stole Danton away,  long before his time.  Why is it that when you are feeling sad and disheartened and would readily welcome a gloomy rainy day, the sun insists on shining brightly day after day after day?  The funeral was on Valentine's Day. Yes, Valentine's Day.  I don't think I will ever spend another Valentine's Day without remembering this particular one filled with great sadness.  The Lutheran Church was filled with over a hundred friends and family members.  Danton was cremated, so there wasn't a body to view, just a beautifully decorated urn portraying a golfer.  It wasn't until the video of Danton's life started that the women cried uncontrollably and even men could be seen wiping away a tear or two.  Thank heavens for Kleenex!  After the funeral and a light luncheon served by the church, we arrived back at their house.  An odd sense of serenity could be seen in Danton's mother, Sonja, and Danton's girlfriend, Kelly, when the urn was set on the table.  At least now they knew where he was. This was the first funeral I have attended for a young person and I guess I never thought about what  happens after the funeral.  Unfortunately, life goes on whether you want it to or not.  You can't help unintentionally waiting for that person to still walk in the door or for a call that will never come.  All you can do is remember this person and continue to keep them alive in your memories by talking about those shared happy moments.  You must go on with the normal everyday things. So since it was Valentine's Day, the twelve of us dined at Danton's favorite local Italian restaurant and the women all left with a long stemmed red rose.

JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT

Three days after Baby Teagan was born and one Z-Pak (antibiotics for a sinus infection) later, new mother and baby came home. After going through at least one box of kleenex, two days with Roxy and Lola, St. Bernise Mountain dogs, and the second snowstorm, it was a welcome change.  Let me just say for the record that I am not a dog lover, but the three of us survived.  What should've been a momentus and unforgettable day, ended up being one but for a totally different reason.  After receiving three phonecalls minutes apart, that went unanswered because I was holding the new baby, I decided to check my voicemail.  My mother left an urgent message for me to return her call.  The other calls were from my brother and my sister.  My first thought was that my father had a heart attack, so I returned the call immediately. My cell phone service kept cutting out, but on the third try it finally stayed connected.  My mother, unsure if the call would be dropped again, blurted out quickly, "Danton is dead!"  I think I stopped breathing for a minute.  She went on, "He was in a car accident."  I took the positive stance and said, "You mean he's in the hospital."  I was sure she was just assuming the worst.  Her response was, "No, he's dead."  After listening to the few details she had been given, I called my brother who confirmed it.  I then made the dreaded phone call to my sister to have her confirmation that yes, her 18 year old son was killed in a car accident a few hours ealier.  I just can't believe it kept going through my head even though I knew it was true.  It truly is a day I will never forget.

FINALLY DID IT

I have been wanting to start a blog for the last two years.  So why haven't I?  To be perfectly honest, I didn't know how and it seemed terribly scary.  The other reason is that if I didn't even attempt it, I couldn't possibly do it wrong.  I did it finally, but I'm not sure if I did it right.  Unfortunately the motivation to finally make the attempt was prompted by February's emotional roller coaster. I had been eagerly contemplating the birth of my new granddaughter, which in itself should be a very happy occasion.  She was stubborn, which I'm sure doesn't run in our family at all, and was finally forced from her warm cozy haven 11 days after the due date. Teagan was born on February 7, 2011 and was 7 lbs 5 oz, 19 1/2  inches long and had dark hair.  Did I mention that my daughters live in Oklahoma?  I can't even count the number of times they call me to brag about how warm it is down there and how I should really move there.   Let me just say that it never fails that each time I visit they are having an unexpected cold spell or a tornado.  This time I managed to hit two major snowstorms of 6 plus inches.  Now in Minnesota, that is not a problem at all, but in Oklahoma it is a major problem when you only have about 10 snowplows for the whole city and its suburbs.  They actually close down the whole city for 2-3 days.   It's absolutely unbelivable.  They did plow the major roads, but then virtually sat back and waited for the snow to melt.  Of course in Minnesota that would take a long time.